Gardening Thread.

[Sabot]

Everything You Don't Need To Know About Gardening.

Nearly Spring and the Crocuses are out. So I have dragged my two heated Propagators out of the glory hole again. Now is the time to start planting seeds.

First I should mention that all of my Vegetables are grown in big pots and cut off parafin containers, the latter suitably washed out first, of course. These are good because I don't have a lot of room. And the dog can't reach to pee on them.

I mainly grown Tomatoes and Runner Beans, from seeds all saved from previous years, so most of my seed are tenth generation Organic.
I gave up buying Tomato Plants after I lost the crop of two Summers to Tomato Blight, and discovered that they were coming out of the Nurseries already infected. There isn't much that is more depressing than a wonderful crop of Tomatoes suddenly turning to slush.

I never use Slug Pellets, preferring to go out every night at dusk with a torch. I chuck my finds over the wall into next door's garden because I cannot bear to kill them. They can't help being ugly and slimy after all. And next door's garden is largely unoccupied except for the Hedgehog or three that I have also thrown over the wall over the years, so really I am only feeding them.
And of course, Slug Pellets do awful things to birds, even the supposedly Green Pellets. The least they do is to render Song Birds infertile.

And Yes, I do like Hedgehogs, but unfortunately so does my dog who brings them in the house, heaven knows how with all of those prickly spines.
I can only add to this that you haven't lived if you've never had a Hedgehog Flea . I had to be sedated for three days to stop me from tearing my skin off, and I ain't risking that again if I can help it.

I do use Chicken Shit Pellets in Winter to gee the pots up a bit, but these are Organic, I think. Not that it matters all that much because I am not obsessive about it. Except for Slug Pellets.

Off to buy a bag of soil to fill the Propagators. Last year I put all of the seeds in pots and then in the Propagator because I didn't realise that you can put the soil straight into the tray. This is what comes of not reading the instructions.

All comments and helpful suggestions welcome.

[bb1]

Yes, it is always a problem keeping anything you actually want to grow out of dog-range; if they don't wee on it, they dig it up, or trample it down.

[Sabot]

Well I seem to have triggered something ghastly. After the mildest Winter ever, so far, everything has been frozen solid all day.
I did plant several Broad Bean Seeds in December, most of which germinated, and they, quite remarkably, seem to be fine.

[bb1]

Well, it is only February, plenty of time for six foot snowdrifts...

[Sabot]

Heaven forbid, Bonny. I've been thinking about digging out my shorts.

[bb1]

Ne'er cast a clout till May be out

[Sabot]

Ne'er cast a clout till May be out

Fear not, I shall still be wearing me Liberty Bodice and Long Johns.

[lily]

[bb1]

Well, I made a start earlier, I had a look at mine, and thought how I would like it to look this summer. Then asked myself, And how the **** do you propose to acheive that?

[lily]

You can but dream and hope, Bonny.

[bb1]

I think I am going to have to get A Man in to lick it into shape.....

[lily]

It does look pretty. You never know, maybe the dogs could dig holes so you just have to drop the plants in?

[bb1]

Hmm. I think it's going to have to be Sabot's suggestion; everything in containers and astroturf instead of grass

[Sabot]

Well, I made a start earlier, I had a look at mine, and thought how I would like it to look this summer. Then asked myself, And how the **** do you propose to acheive that?

You should never look at a garden as a whole, only in bits and pieces. If there is a gap, stick something in it. Preferably a pot which you can stick something in. And the dog can't piss on it.
If you haven't got a Dog, pots have their own charm.

[Sabot]

I think I am going to have to get A Man in to lick it into shape.....

Jesus, My garden is never going to look that good. Shut up and stop complaining.

Next.

[lily]

Why not, Sabot?

[bb1]

Jesus, My garden is never going to look that good. Shut up and stop complaining.

No, that's what I want mine to look like, Sabot..

It's more like this just now:



Only muddier.....

[Sabot]

Why not, Sabot?

Gardens have feelings, Lily. They get upset if you are rude about them. And then everything DIES.

[Sabot]

Jesus, My garden is never going to look that good. Shut up and stop complaining.

No, that's what I want mine to look like, Sabot..

It's more like this just now:



Only muddier.....

Charming. Love the Japanese Screen. Move it closer to the house.

[bb1]

That isn't mine either, I was just googling for pics of trashed gardens

MsMarbles is brilliant at sorting out gardens, not me. I just have fancy notions about what I would like, which don't always square with what is achievable...

[Sabot]

Start Small, Bonny. I bought two pots of dying Pink Daisies today for 50 Centimes each. Someone forgot to water them. They do this a lot. Rescue a Flower today.

[Sabot]

Here's a question for you all.

While I wait to plant my Runner Bean Seeds in the Propogator, which are currently soaking in a glass of water, I am preparing to paint a Marble Fire Surround. And before anyone hollers "Sacrilege" it isn't actually Marble, but some horrible shiny composite. It has a bloody great crack in it and leaks white frondy, powdery bits that never stop forming no matter what I do to it.
The room is predominately green, so I don't want any more of that, but I am having a hard time deciding what colour to paint it.
The room is very 1940s French renovation which is almost impossible to describe if you've never seen what The French did to old stone houses in the 1940s. But I suspect they were trying to take their minds off The Germans, probably unsuccessfully.

[bb1]

Maybe you could recreate something like this, Sabot?



I beleive it is Illustrious and Important Art.

[Sabot]

I want a reasonably acceptable fireplace, Bonny, not a pseudo, pretentious nightmare that looks like a runaway grapevine.

PS. Do you think it might look better in Purple and Turquoise?

[lily]

Maybe you could recreate something like this, Sabot?



I beleive it is Illustrious and Important Art.

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